In Britain, every first date is a group date. Instead of a solo first outing, they go out with their friends, snog and figure it out later. (Snog means make-out, or, if we want to get specific with Urban Dictionary, to interface passionately with another being, creating a field of physical obsession and focused arousal centered on the lips, mouth and tongue. Totally written by a Brit.)
Anyway, my British friend, who has lived in America for the last 5 years, cannot, for the life of him, figure out why Americans would subject themselves to the awkward torture of a first date.
At first, I balked at his notion. Snogging before a first date sets a precedence of disrespect. Plus, its so passe. I left snogging on the dance floor of Sigma Chi, thank you very much.
And then I realized that was a blatant lie. Since graduation, my first dates have gotten nothing but big, fat fail whales, and instead, I go out with my friends and snog. In fact, I snog the same people that I did in college.
Furthermore, the most mature relationship of my dating career was with someone who is in still in school. And do you know what we did when we met? We snogged. In fact, we snoggered, which I just decided will be the next Urban Dictionary entry for had sex. We were together for 8 months, and I do not believe that my decision to snogger him had an impact on our relationship.
As much as we (and by we, I mean the majority of the post-grad female population) like to believe that graduation puts an end to drunken hookups and opens up the world of traditional American courtship, this is simply not the case. Graduation gives you a piece of paper, not the charisma and confidence to slide your way through a first date. Thats why the best first dates still usually involve buckets of beer or martinis, aka shots for adults.
So take it from a snogging convert, Ignighter and the Brits are on to something. Snogging does not set the precedent for your relationship, the person whom you snog does. This will be the case whether or not you have an awkward, solo first date or whether you choose to snog. So take a shot and have at it. Ill be the one in the corner this weekend.
